Ruination Day

My dream was in tatters. The restort a shambles. What wasn't burned to the ground had been trampled by giant monsters or wild bands of synthoids that were still running amok.
"Look its the master!" exclaimed one the muddy synthoids recognising me.
"No Disassemble! No Disassemble!." they screamed. They covered their ears so they could not hear the commands I gave. It didn't matter I had my blaster and shot them all.

"All I wanted was to turn Dagobah into a Health Resort where cute co-eds and hot cougars could indulge in treatments and massage." I whined blasting the cute synthoids and wiping a few tears from my eyes.
"WHAT WENT WRONG??????" I screamed to the skies

"On evil ground you did build." says a voice behind me.

"Yoda!" I turn in hope but it was just Henchy.

"Dude! Don't do that to me." I complain. "How did we build on evil ground?"

"Hey look it up on Wookiepedia. Evil cave full of Dark Side Mojo and thats where you put your Resort. " explained the worlds best number 2 man. "You didn't do your research and guess what, Epic Fail!"
"Ciera is gloating already isn't she?" I sigh.
"I ain't seen her but Yeah she is." replies Henchy. "C'mon lets see if any of those co-eds and cougars survived we can "entertain" them till the rescue ships arrive."
"You mean ply them with Tequila and get them to go skinny dipping?" I enquire.
"Yeah good times!" answers Henchy."Cause I've scoped two hot courgars already."